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Alastair fucking Campbell
2012-12-18 04:15 pm (UTC)
Oh do pipe down.
*Peter makes himself a cup of tea and a bowl of muesli, pondering whether he should send Alastair as is, or try and find a better container.
He wanders through to the garden and digs through the shed. A very old hamster cage (part of a gift intended for one of the godchildren which was then vetoed by said child's parents) is uncovered and dusted off. Even the wheel still works.
After a good shake to get rid of any webs, he takes it back inside, fills the bottom with shredded newspaper and places the cage on its side, next to the pickle jar containing a very angry Alastair who seems to have worked out Peter's intentions pretty quickly and has decided to voice his objections as best he can.
Peter ignores the high pitched obscentities, choosing instead to unscrew the lid, close the mouth of the jar with the magazine again, then tip the jar until it's upside down, with the mouth directly over the cage's door.*
*Peter whisks away the magazine, dropping Alastair into the cage. It's quite a way to fall for the 6 inch spin doctor, but there's sufficient pading from the newspaper that Peter thinks the man won't have broken anything. He swings the cage door shut and locks it, then gently tilts it back to being upright, causing a small avalanche of shredded paper to cover Campbell.*
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